Can we not waste time and just agree, because COME ON!, that this was fully intentional and CELEBRATE IT?! This is harm-free gossip. This is the kind of gossip performance we need more of. Nobody will be doing a documentary about this in ten years and regretting that we all revelled in the moment. Sophie Turner and Taylor Swift are here to serve notice – and we’re not the one getting served; our job here is to observe, to be witnesses. Let us gladly cooperate.
Sophie, as we know, is fresh off her split from Joe Jonas. We haven’t heard much from her. We have heard TOO MUCH from him, even though he tried to say that none of the stories out there represented his thoughts, I think we’ve already covered here how implausible that was, considering how much detail accompanied the accurate reporting from TMZ about him consulting with divorce lawyers and how they got the jump on him filming. The initial narrative was that Sophie was an absent parent which obviously Sophie herself wouldn’t be advancing.
As for Taylor, well, she dated Joe Jonas but more notably she became close friends with people who also dated Joe Jonas – Gigi Hadid first and then Sophie; she and Sophie have been friends for a while. On “Invisible String” she sings:
“Cold was the steel of my axe to grind
For the boys who broke my heart
Now I send their babies presents”
It was never a question, though, where Taylor’s loyalty would lie. Sophie gets Taylor in the divorce, and Taylor is stepping up in support.
You want to float stories about my friend and suggest she’s the reason your marriage fell apart? While you’re doing pap walks of your own with the kids, a strategy that backfired, we’ll go out for dinner in New York, surrounded by fans and photographers, strut out the restaurant unbothered, coming through with the 1989 energy. Taylor gets to look like the protective friend-hero; and Sophie gets the protection of the Squad. It’s a mutually beneficial counteroffensive, leaving the other side powerless in response. And a much better way to mobilise the squad spirit. This will age a lot better than how the squad was squadding almost a decade ago.
And finally, an update on Taylor’s rumoured new romance – Jason Kelce, Travis’s brother, was on a radio show this morning and… seemed to confirm it?!
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