❗
Disclaimer: This article was posted during an early period of the site when some of the writing was extremely offensive. Since then our site has grown and evolved. We have apologised, continue to take accountability, and documented our changes. Please see our FAQ on our About page for our formal statement.

Please, please take Beckham OFF that Freebie 5 list! Are you crazy? He has a small football in place of a brain, is as vain as a peacock and … the voice! Have you HEARD him speak? Do you really find that falsetto estuary twang a turn-on? Maybe it sounds exotic to a non-Brit, I don’t know. Personally, I wouldn’t hit it for a blank cheque. Each to her own, I suppose. I can see the attraction of Joaquin, Brad is Brad is Brad, and Ryan I’ll take your word on as I’ve never seen a film of his. But Beckham? No no no no no. All the more so when you consider where he’s been … Dear Mo: Maybe you and I are different this way but I don"t need the man to deliver a sonnet while he"s having his way with me behind a waterfall in Tahiti.

Share this post