The Walking Dead, Season 3, Episode 10 recap.

So Rick is losing his goddamn mind because Lori is horrible even from the grave. Let’s resume.

Oh look, Michonne is sneaking out. I get that they’re trying to play her up as mysterious and distrustful, et cetera, but at some point she’s going to have to start talking at least a little and get some character development going.

And Rick’s hallucinating again. Lori sucks even when she’s dead. Jesus, Rick. Get your sh*t together.

Michonne is just watching all this craziness happen, by the way.

WHAT THE HELL, RICK. YOU DIDN’T EVEN LIKE HER WHEN SHE DIED.

Woodbury. Gross. I can’t wait until all these people get eaten by zombies.

Andrea. Worse. I can’t wait until the Governor inevitably kills her. (Because she’s a threat to his power base because she can handle zombies and the aftermath and he can’t.) And no, I don’t buy this whole “you should be in charge” thing he’s selling. He’ll get his head together and want to be top dog again and then it will be sayonara Andrea. …It’s not like any of us will miss her, though, right?

Daryl’s like, “Um, I think maybe I made a mistake,” but he’s still incredibly naïve about the wisdom of mixing Merle with Rick & Co.

Look at Glenn being all in charge, even his plan of “let’s assassinate the Governor tonight” is a dumbass one. Plan B—let’s prepare to defend ourselves from the Governor’s inevitable retaliatory strike—makes much more sense.

I’m not sure I get Glenn’s attitude right now. I know he’s been through some hard sh*t recently, but the show has handled his relationship with Maggie really well to this point and suddenly they’re at each other’s throats. That feels more than a little inorganic.

Ew. Creepy Dr. Mengele. I hope he’s first-eaten when the zombies come for Woodbury. And see? The Governor assigns the creep to watch Andrea. He’s totally going to kill her.

Some dude named Martinez has gone off with the Governor (probably, they’re both missing). Not good.

And the prison is being overrun by zombies (again).

This is what I’m talking about—Maggie recounting what the Governor did to her is an oddly contentious moment. I know the stress is mounting but through all their other hard times, Maggie and Glenn have held it together. And yet now they’re fighting. It feels less like actual character motivation and more like since there’s no more Rick and Horrible Lori to fight, these two will fill the void.

So the convict (God, I cannot remember this guy’s name) is not only a liar (he’s in jail not for drugs but an armed robbery charge which he claims was bullsh*t) but he can’t use a gun. And Carol, because she has terrible taste in everything, is oddly charmed by this.

Frankly, that dude has “pervert” written all over him.

Merle and Daryl tromping through the woods. What happens if they get poison ivy?

They stumble across a family trapped on a bridge by zombies. Merle is all “f*ck ’em,” but Daryl is like, “OMG SAVE THE BABY” because that’s his primary motivation in life.

Is Daryl down to just the one arrow? Uh-oh.

Reaction to Daryl slamming a zombie’s head in a car’s trunk door: “Oh. My. GOD.” *rewind*

Merle is, for the most part, useless during this fight, by the way. Can’t decide if it’s his racism (the family is Latino) or that he’s assessing Daryl’s skills. Probably a combination of both.

Am inordinately proud of Daryl for standing up to Merle and making him leave the family alone. Next step: Go back to Rick.

And to add insult to injury, the family backs over the smushed zombie’s head as they peel out. Double-tap!

AND Daryl was right about the direction they were walking in.

Oh whoa. Okay. Now we’re into some deep sh*t.

1)  Daryl points out Merle chose to cut his own hand off, no one did that to him and they did in fact go back for him, so. That’s all on Merle.

2) Merle reveals they were going to rob the survivors’ camp before Rick showed up. (!!!)

3) Daryl accuses Merle of abandoning him when they were kids, in the scuffle his shirt tears and reveals scars across his back. Their dad beat Daryl when Merle wasn’t there to protect him.

3a) Merle is a piece of sh*t. I hope he gets stung by a million bees, and then eaten by a zombie.

4) Daryl decides to go back to the prison (GOOD).

Back to punk-ass Glenn. Herschel is trying to talk him down but Glenn is like, “Everyone is either insane or gone, who else will do this sh*t,” which is a really good point.

And where did they get that brand new Dodge pickup? I get this show is expensive, which means corporate sponsors are a necessary evil, but can we be a little less blatant about the product placement? Please?

Back to Crazy Town with Rick. Herschel tries to talk him down, but Rick is like, “I’ve got…stuff.” But at least he confesses to hallucinating Horrible Lori. Herschel’s like, “You’re nuts. Come inside.”

Rick doesn’t go inside.

Oh noes! It’s the Governor! Of course his “if they leave us alone, we’ll leave them alone” talk was bull.

He snipes the pervert convict. It appears to be just him and that Martinez guy. Maybe this will snap Rick out of it, though.

GET IT TOGETHER RICK.

Did one of those guys get on the watch tower? I can’t really tell who is shooting at whom.

How is everyone this bad a shot?

Oh SH*T. They just unloaded a literal truckload of zombies into the prison yard. The Governor SUCKS.

And one-legged Herschel is trapped out there.

Rick is out of ammo, but at least Maggie finally got the guy on the watch tower. How did he even get up there?

Daryl and Merle save Rick! So I guess Merle is going to join the group, or try anyway. And Glenn is back, in time to MISS EVERYTHING. At least he gave Herschel a ride in.

So, Rick, are we done being crazy now?

Status check:
Rick – Looney tunes.
The Governor – God do we hate him.
Andrea – Doomed.
Lori – Horrible even from the beyond.
Daryl – Back in the fold!
Merle – Tagging along. Ugh.
Maggie and Glenn – Still fighting.

Worst thing seen/heard this week: The scars on Daryl’s back. Because that’s real-world evil.

Zombie kill of the week (maybe EVER): Daryl to the head with a trunk door.

Photos courtesy AMC