As mentioned yesterday (click here for a refresher), Gwyneth Paltrow is in Chicago for GOOP. There was a book signing. And I wanted to see the outfit. And there was a professional photographer there!

It’s a wrap dress. Wrap dresses are not my favourite for me. Because of my tits. It’s hard to get that wrap sh-t happening when you’re pouring out. G doesn’t have that problem. This looks great on her. It’ll probably look great on Apple in a few years.

G gave an interview recently and revealed that Apple’s already borrowing her clothes. They’re sharing t-shirts now. F-ck. I’m jealous of a 10 year old. Think of the bags, the shoes, the “vintage”. On top of what she’ll already be getting from designers for simply being her mother’s child. Stella McCartney, for example, is probably already dressing Apple Martin.

Some of you have emailed about G and the MET Gala and whether or not she’ll be going. Well she wasn’t there last year because in 2013 she bitched about it being too crowded and she talked about how Kanye West yelled at everyone, remember? And if Beyonce decides not to go? There’s no way G will.