Mimi Can’t Even
UPDATE: Have just been informed that this video is a fraud. So I’ve started drinking because it’s been a long ass 48 hours and I need some real joy. Can we all will this into reality?
When I’m down and out, I have a go-to list of food items, books, movies, and moments that bring me out of the darkness, if only temporarily. Some work better than others. The newest addition to that list works really, really, really well. It’s now at least top 3. And it’s Mimi. To be honest, Mimi takes up most of the entire list. Because Mimi is guaranteed to make you smile. This time we have Good Morning America to thank.
For some reason they thought it would be a good idea to make Mimi sit through 30 seconds of I Can’t Ariana Grande singing All I Want For Christmas Is You. And they put a camera on her. And the result…is this:
that time when they made mariah carey listen to ariana grande pic.twitter.com/OzD63pKz7t— ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ (@Forever_Jason) November 29, 2015
You just watched that back twice, didn’t you?
You’re about to go for a third, right?
Mimi KNOWS shade. SHE KNOWS. So don’t tell me she wasn’t aware of what her face was doing. Don’t tell me she didn’t smile like it was a grimace. And when she blinks? Repeatedly? And closes her smile so that you don’t see teeth anymore? Come on. That’s Mimi enduring I Can’t. And Mimi can’t even.
Mimi has lists too. She calls them her “moments”. Moments come in only two categories for Mimi: “Festive” and “Bleak”. Watching I Can’t sing Mimi’s most iconic song probably qualifies as “bleak”. But one person’s bleak is another person’s festive. This, to me, is all f-cking festive.