Michael Fassbender opens today

Lainey Posted by Lainey at December 21, 2016 15:54:19 December 21, 2016 15:54:19

Michael Fassbender’s Assassin’s Creed opens today. As you probably know, it’s based on the video game. Video game film adaptations are usually sh-t. We were supposed to think that maybe this one would be the exception because Michael Fassbender is a Serious Actor. And presumably has the Good Taste of a Serious Actor. And he produced it, the first movie he’s ever produced.

Well, the reviews are coming in. And the reviews are not so good. Forbes actually called it a “bloodbath”. Many reviewers are saying it’s a mess. But critics don’t necessarily speak gamer. So maybe the gamers will be into it? Still, as I’ve been saying about this movie, it needs more than just gamers to get it. Otherwise, what’s the point in turning it into a movie? Do I want to see this movie or would I rather see Rogue One for the second time?

Michael’s been trying to promote Assassin’s Creed for a few weeks now. Last night he was on with Seth Meyers. Last week he did an air guitar-off with Jimmy Fallon. It wasn’t bad. But in terms of good TV, there is no producer that will tell you that air guitar battle is better than lip sync battle even though, maybe, lip sync battle might not be as “cool” as air guitar battle. That’s almost the point though. You have to be willing to get real silly to lip sync battle. The more you commit to being silly, the more cool you become in exchange. So, no, I’m not all that impressed with Michael Fassbender’s air guitaring. To me it feels like a half-step. At this point though, I’m not sure what he’s trying to preserve. 

Lloyd Bishop/ NBC/ NBCU/ Getty Images

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