Well you probably expected this: the new issue of PEOPLE Magazine featuring Jennifer Aniston and Justin Theroux’s wedding. It’s a file photo from the Oscars. But the text on the cover says “exclusive photos”. What are the photos?

It can’t be a dress. If it were the dress, they wouldn’t put it on the inside and not the outside. It would be a waste of money. So… probably some pictures of the setup? The tables? The lights? The house? Is it possible that Jen won’t be selling the money shots?

Page Six reported the other day that Jen signed a $5 million deal with Emirates Airlines – and this has now been confirmed. She’ll appear in commercials worldwide. Have you flown Emirates before? They know what they’re doing. They don’t stop feeding you – and I’m talking about economy class and not the crazy ass first class cabin. The first class cabin is next level, at least that’s what I’ve heard.

Anyway, it’s an interesting partnership. Because Emirates and Etihad (which Nicole Kidman will be repping) are growing fast. And they’re looking to move in on North American routes, challenging US airlines. Which is why getting America’s sweetheart on board is a smart ask. She’s telling the MiniVan Majority they have another option…although I do wonder whether or not she’ll be accused of not supporting home business. That argument though, well, I mean it’s not like people don’t drive German/Japanese/etc cars.

Back to the wedding…

PEOPLE reveals that part of the reason it took them so long to get married is that they couldn’t decide where to do it. And that one of the main factors for marrying at home in LA is so that they could involve their two dogs. It also took them a while to work out the whole New York and Los Angeles thing. Initially she tried NYC living only to realise that she really prefers California. Obviously he’s down with that now too. I’m telling you, from the moment he locked down his deal with CAA, near the beginning of their relationship, he’s shown us he knows how to play this game. This is what she’s been looking for. Vince Vaughn couldn’t do it. John Mayer is an idiot. Justin fits her this way.

As for the photos…

Terry Richardson was there. And maybe Terry thinks he’s better than PEOPLE and the weeklies? A reader last week suggested that it might be Rolling Stone. That would actually be a great move, something she could lord over the others. And a little old school too, like Carly Simon and James Taylor styles.

Click here to read more about the wedding at PEOPLE.