It occurred to me that you could, in theory, bitch on Olivia Wilde’s ass for making everyone look like sh-t last night at the Butter premiere. But then again, Jennifer Garner has her own personal bodyguard. So there’s no reason she can’t find a better dress.

Is a pink sparkly ballet bridesmaid cotton candy tinkerbell REALLY the best choice for a pregnant lady? Really??? It’s infantile and gross. And I actually feel bad saying this because she was so nice last night.

Before the gala, the cast attended a cocktail party for the film at the VitaminWater rooftop at the Burroughs. It’s an old building. There’s only one elevator. And this is an important detail because they normally don’t have to ride elevators with regular people at these events, only this time they had no choice. I was waiting for the elevator when she arrived with two publicist types, a makeup artist, and a personal bodyguard. Not from the festival but a personal dude who had travelled to Toronto from wherever assigned to look after her, specifically.

Jennifer Garner?

I guess she has more in common with Jennifer Lopez than just Ben Affleck.

The bodyguard gave me a look like he didn’t want my riffraff Chinese ass to come inside with them. Too bad. I was hungry. Normally I’m all for ceding the elevator to these assholes. I did it the other day for Rachel Weisz. But I’d just come from working a live red carpet. I had to go back to work in an hour. And I needed a drink. In other words, her bodyguard could f-ck off. I got in the elevator.

But not before a dude on the bike, an employee from the building, came out of the elevator to go home at the end of a long day. He was weirded out by the situation. What with the photographers and the fanciness, poor guy was, sorry, I don’t really know what’s happening, sorry, let me get out of your way. Which is when Garner, very sweetly, with a big genuine smile, invited him to come up for a cocktail. As you can imagine, he was dazzled. It was adorable.

In the elevator she was equally gracious and chatty. And when she arrived she was lovely to guests and sweet with requests and I saw her loading up on candies in her purse to eat during the screening. Was cute. And not vain and pouty. Unlike Ashley Greene who had to check a full length mirror, in front of the entire party, within moments of arriving. Loser.

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