Princess Beatrice Gossip

Princess Beatrice is engaged to Edoardo Mapelli Mozzi. They’re been dating eleven months. Edoardo is being described as a “property tycoon”. That’s how the British media are referring to him. Question for “property tycoons” – are you mad at the “property tycoons” who came before you, because I feel like the gave “property tycoon” a bad name and a sh-tty reputation. Full Story

Taylor Swift stepped out yesterday in New York in plaid, flats, and a cross-body and it’s the perfect outfit for “what to wear to class on a fall day”, the only minor issue being the size of the bag. Full Story

The Queen celebrated her actual 90th birthday in April but this weekend is the mega blowout in London. All mega blowouts start at church, which is where the royal family gathered today for a thanksgiving service. Full Story

Day 1 of Royal Ascot. The Queen was joined by a few of her grandchildren including Zara Phillips and Prince Harry who wore a top hat, per the dress code. Oh of course there’s a dress code. A strict dress code. When I was in Windsor a few weeks ago, I wanted to walk the Long Walk. It’s like 10km or something. Full Story

The Royals Season 1, Episode 4 recap  Usually I title recaps with a notable line of dialogue from that week’s episode, but The Royals simply doesn’t provide notable dialogue, so for this show, I’m switching to the most absurd thing that happens in the episode. This week, it’s Helena’s revenge on a peasanty whiskey distiller who dares speaks to her in Snide Tones. Full Story

Team GB has been owning the velodrome. We were watching the men’s sprint yesterday - you know the event where they spend the first few laps mindf-cking each other before actually racing? Ryan Lochte shouldn’t be a cyclist. Jacek gets really shouty over the race where the athletes are paced by the dude on the white bike who looks like he’s going for a leisurely ride through the field to pick up some bread and a pint of milk. Full Story

Zara Phillips competed in cross-country equestrian today at the Olympics. She had her very own Royal Cheering Section and she finished under the limit in front of her family fans which included Prince William and his Catherine, Prince Harry, Princesses Eugenie and Beatrice, and Camilla too. (I’m watching gymnastics right now and I just turned my head away but could have sworn Will and Harry are there watching the men. Full Story

Look, I know the whole world was like What The F-ck about this and I'm not saying it was the prettiest headgear I've ever seen or anything but that probably wasn't the point. Princess Beatrice, 5th in line to the throne, clearly wanted to go big. And, well, she did. BIG. She didn't care if you liked it, she only wanted you to remember it. Full Story

Hot Harry along with his father, his stepmother, his aunts, uncles, and cousins attended a church service today to remember his great grandmother the Queen Mother. Really, really want to know what Princess Anne is lecturing him about. Harry is rather close with Beatrice and Eugenie. I’ve always wondered when they were growing up, like in other families, whether or not there was a “kids’ table”. Full Story

Prince Harry attended a charity trading event yesterday in London, confirming a 15 billion pound deal. Harry also worked the phones for half an hour or so. Check him out. Wherever he is he always looks like he’s at a bar. Harry’s birthday is on Thursday. He’ll be 27. 27 years old, heading for Apache helicopter training soon. Full Story