Can we start with how that song won for Best Song? How f-cking uncomfortable too that it happened right after Gaga performed and had everyone sobbing in the aisles. It was AWKWARD in that theatre. Because, um, that was a sh-t Bond theme, wasn't it? Like there's no other way to say it! The song sucks!

That was one of the most obvious moments of Academy disconnect and the influence of the old white male on the Oscars. They looked at that category, saw that it was for a Bond movie, and that's the box they clinked.

So then Sam Smith comes up on stage and decides to make up history, declaring himself the only openly gay man to win an Oscar? A fallacy, obviously.

And he's told. By Dustin Lance Black:



Let's just take a moment now to let out some HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA.

That's two slaps! One slap for education. And another slap as a territorial warning. Step OFF my really hot Olympic diver boyfriend who you've been texting on the low - do you not know me?!?

So was Sam really ignorant about Oscar gay history or was he playing that way to undercut a romantic rival?!?!?

More! We need more! More gay boy sh-t! It's the best sh-t!