You know what I learned this week? Going to the media to say how much you want to reconcile with a parent while also talking about how toxic the relationship is really doesn’t seem to work for British families.
Yesterday afternoon, TMZ shot a de facto cannon through Brand Beckham, with Brooklyn being painted as the berated and unwelcome son and Nicola as the well-meaning and boundary-holding daughter-in-law.
This comes after Brooklyn and Nicola skipped David’s birthday – according to earlier sources via TMZ (again), they flew to London to have a private celebration and were rebuffed. The stakes have been raised with the newest story, which alleges that the parental Beckhams are toxic for yelling at Brooklyn on the phone and specifically noting that Nicola has deemed them “narcissistic.” I’m going deeper with TMZ because they were first to the story and their reporting is the most incendiary.
Here is what is sticking out for me right off the top: there is a distinct narrative change on Brooklyn and Nicola’s part. Less than a week ago, it was about Romeo’s girlfriend Kim Turnbull and that was the only reason they didn’t want to hang around the family. But now, it is being framed as David and Victoria have been the problem the whole time. That may be true but if so, why bring Romeo into it at all? Families are messy and complex but it seems like Brooklyn and Nicola have a pattern. You know that attention-seeking, always-has-a-personal-crisis, high-drama former coworker you never got around to unfollowing, who constantly posts self-help quotes? Imagine if she had a publicist.
Next in line in the airing of grievances: a source said Nicola feels that the Beckhams do not support her and she always supports their business ventures. Oh sweet summer child. Nicola has a touch of the BLS (billionaire loser syndrome) – NO ONE cares if Nicola promotes anything the Beckhams do. They are a corporation! Nicola is rich and made one movie financed by her crusty old fart dad that no one cares about (and the Beckhams showed up for the premiere). Rich people refuse to understand this one simple thing: being rich does not make you influential and cool. It just makes you rich. Get a grip, Nicola’s publicist sources.
TMZ also traces tension back to a wedding that, in hindsight, seems incredibly exhausting. Soon after the wedding, as stories about a rift were leaking, the narrative was that Nicola was pissed that Marc Anthony (an old family friend) sang for Victoria and Brooklyn. In this new TMZ version, Victoria is accused of “running up to the dance floor and basically pushing Nicola away”.
The Beckhams have impeccable manners and have been in the spotlight for years. In what world would Victoria make an ass out of herself like that? I’ve been to dozens of weddings, I’ve been a bridesmaid over ten times, I can read “love is patient, love is kind” standing on my head. At weddings, everyone is on their best behaviour. If gossip is a buffet, this is microwaved steak – grisly, overdone and unappetizing.
Nicola needs to stop hanging out with her mom and get some friends. Preferably someone who can hold her hand and say loving and respectfully, NO ONE gives a sh-t about your wedding the second it is over.
Then there’s the narcissism and toxicity claims. First off, this is very TikTok language because narcissism is not a diagnosis you make on the internet but it is the buzzword of the day. (Side note: have you ever noticed the people who throw this accusation around at others always seem to exhibit the traits they accuse others of having? Just an observation!)
We can’t say whether or not David and Victoria are great parents; we don’t know the inner workings of their home, or if they upset Brooklyn. But if we look at David and Victoria’s overall life, let’s consider that David has loads of longtime friends from childhood and football. Multiple decades-long friendships. Same with Victoria. They have maintained a friendship with Tom Cruise. Tom Cruise! He’s a weirdo but he’s also super secretive, he’s not friends with just anyone.
They have both run multiple businesses with long-standing partners, been on several councils, have done charity work, she’s been in one of the world’s biggest music groups and still maintains ties with them. They are often on holiday with their parents, on both sides, and siblings. Their relationships have depth.
But according to TMZ’s sources sharing Brooklyn and Nicola’s position, we are meant to believe that David and Victoria are toxic narcissists who have managed to stay married for 25 years, and convinced everyone in their life from their elementary school mates to their colleagues (in highly competitive industries) to people even more famous and powerful than them, that they are the model of family-first unity. On top of that, they’ve fooled the general public and a Netflix documentary team. Sure. They are either the world’s most manipulative people or maybe, they really are just a loving family. Which seems more likely?
Now, after a few years of taking jabs and largely ignoring it, it seems like David and Victoria are annoyed, hence the subsequent stories. PEOPLE came out within an hour of TMZ and the reporting is quite neutral and downplays the whole bit, saying that all were invited and things will stabilize. It’s the mature take on it all.
US Weekly was next and interestingly, it’s focused on Brooklyn. Essentially, the source says he has an issue with everything; he is difficult and dramatic and Victoria and David are over it right now. Everyone else is happy to show up, they do a lot of events as a family and Brooklyn creates “drama” over everything from birthdays to vacations to holidays. I’m sure it took some serious household conversation for the “sources” to reach out because it’s very specific; stern but not too damaging or harsh.
This story is not about really about the rift, family rifts are normal. The story is why we know about the rift. It's easy for people to blame Nicola for coming between him and his family and orchestrating the leaks but Brooklyn is a big boy. It’s HIS job to manage the relationship with HIS parents and HIS siblings.
Online, I suspect the biggest debate will be about Nicola’s participation: if your spouse is on the outs with their own parents, do you get in the trenches with them, or do you hang back and be a supportive background player? Are you the quiet sounding board or going hard for your spouse at every turn? Every family dynamic is different and it seems like Nicola is willing to go to the mat (and TMZ) to paint Brooklyn as a dutiful son and David as harsh and Victoria as the typical nightmare MIL who doesn’t want to let her baby boy go. The birthday party was already in the rearview mirror and the TMZ story not only revived it, but escalated it.
And it’s a lot of guff with no payoff. There is literally no upside to us knowing about this for any of the parties involved. David and Victoria obviously will want to shield their kids. And Brooklyn and Nicola are overestimating their appeal. They may be perfectly nice people but they are also classic nepo babies, obscenely wealthy and slightly clueless. There is a bored quality to them. Their Instagram is filled with them “having fun” all over the world but it’s a bit flat and lifeless. They are harmless and charmless. Do we need to add “attention-seeking and tiring” to the list? They’ve only been married three years. Their marriage is a toddler. I can’t imagine when it goes through puberty.
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