Dear Gossips, 

It’s supposed to be the season of kindness and forgiveness, right? Supposed to be but, you know, that’s not how it often plays out. And that’s definitely not how it’s playing out between Cardi B and Offset. 


Cardi confirmed a couple of weeks ago that they’d broken up. Last Friday she went on IG live, clearly upset, and read him to filth. It was the way her voice cracked for me, she is going through it, and if you’ve been through it, you know how it feels. 

As Cardi said during that outburst, “You’ve really been feeling yourself because of your b-tch ass album and sh-t. And you’ve really been doing me dirty after so many f-cking years that I motherf-cking helped your ass, not even a f-cking thank you that I got from your b-tch ass”. 


Cardi has always had a way with words, she cuts right to the heart of it, and that is the broken heart of it, obvious to anyone who’s been watching. There is so much we don’t know about the private lives of celebrities, of course, but if you’ve been paying attention to the Cardi and Offset story, there was no doubt that she was carrying his ass, he is her kryptonite, and he knew how to make that work to his advantage – not only when they were together but even still while she’s trying to quit him. 

And now? It’s getting next-level petty. 


A New Year’s-off. Both Cardi and Offset will perform in Miami at the Fontainebleau. Tickets for Cardi are going for $5K - $25K. Offset’s prices are more affordable, starting at $125 up to $12K. That’s exactly right, the numbers don’t lie. But now it’s a matter of who can attract the bigger crowd and bring the most hype which… like… I’m always here for a dance-off or a party-off in the long run, this doesn’t serve Cardi, this doesn’t advance the post-Offset era. He still lives rent-free in her head, and that’s the control she hasn’t yet figured out how to conquer. I wish there was a magic pill for being able to cure us when we’re being f-ckboyed, but if you’ve been there, or if you know someone who’s been there, there’s no quick way out. Cardi will end 2023 with Offset, literally. 

Yours in gossip,