Last week Lainey wrote about the short list to play Goose’s son in Top Gun 2, which included Nicholas Hoult, Glen Powell, and Miles Teller. Proving that we live in the darkest timeline, Variety is reporting that Miles Teller has been cast as Goose Jr. Lainey preferred Teller for the gossip potential and also noted that his douche-bro reputation and screen presence make him an obvious choice to quell any potential homoeroticism in the sequel (Lainey: unfortunately, because Top Gun’s gayness is one of its enduring strengths). But I can’t back Miles Teller as Goose’s son because Goose was so charming and likeable. All I know is that 1) Goose must be so disappointed at how his son turned out and 2) we do not deserve Glen Powell. 

So Top Gun 2 has been confirmed as titled Top Gun: Maverick, which is boring. I will only recognize this movie as MAVERICK: LEGEND OF THE SKIES. And we don’t know the name of Goose’s son yet, and it doesn’t even matter because who remembers their names? It’s all about the call signs. What will Goose’s son’s call sign be? It SHOULD be Gosling, I would settle for “Goose Jr.”, but it will probably be something like Ace or Cobra or Striker. The call signs in Top Gun are all cool, except, kinda, “Goose”, but that’s also the most realistic one. I have a friend who is a fighter pilot and his call sign is more funny than anything. Most of them are. They are nicknames given by their squadron, who are constantly roasting each other, so the call signs are usually more colorful than cool. But Goose Jr. will probably have a cool call sign, when, really, we all know he should be called “Punchface”. Or “Goose’s Disappointment”.