A Meghan Sussex Love Letter (to Meghan Sussex)

I have finally worked through With Love, Meghan, an extended infomercial for her new brand that is about her loving and learning and learning and loving. She makes honey puns and says things like “progress over perfection” and marvels at nature in lush Montecito. 

The new Netflix series opens with her beekeeping and her skin looks amazing, even through the beekeeping veil. 

Production-wise, this show is very full. There’s a swirl of background music, it is well-lit (which I appreciate) and the set is brimming with flowers and jars and wooden spoons. And it’s a used set: Meghan does a lot, in terms of activities. She cooks and bakes and makes candles (for the first time) and cuts flowers and bags bath salts, the entire time cooing about how loved her friends will feel. 

The homey aspect of the show is a bit out of tune with how it is edited as it jumps between tasks, which is meant to tie activities together but by the end of an episode, I wasn’t that invested in an activity she did for a minute at the top of the episode. It actually made the show drag a bit, for a half hour series.

Early on, Meghan makes it clear this is not her house (as I said previously, this makes total sense; they have two small children and can’t have weirdos knowing the layout of their house). I don’t think it impacts the show, she looks comfortable in the space and it feels like her space and her taste. As people pop in and out, everyone in Meghan’s orbit swoons over her. She is the most beautiful, the best hostess, the most graceful woman, the most beautiful, the most thoughtful… the most everything. Writing her name as “Meg” causes the crew to stop and point it out. She is aspirational even for the people who are already in her rare orbit.

Everyone is stunning and impressive. But at times, it feels like watching the three women on the new season of The White Lotus complimenting each other while pretending they’ve had no work done, while they all secretly clock each other’s work. Everything in Meghan’s word is a marvel. Simple things make her wide-eyed with amazement. Egg yolks, honey, flowers, herbs, blood oranges. It’s all magical. There’s an incredible earnestness that, against my natural cynicism, feels legitimate. What works about this show is that I truly think this is who Meghan is, as a person. This is who she was “before, during and after” to use her term. She is in awe over everyday things and people are amazed by her and it’s all very nice. After watching this series, I genuinely believe she would not say the word “slut” in her podcast.  

But does Meghan know what she’s doing? We aren’t going to compare her to Alice Waters (who pops in to make a quiche but doesn’t stay for the meal) or Anthony Bourdain (a lot of has been made of a producer from No Reservations working on this show, but they are fathoms apart) or Ina or Martha, but Meghan isn’t about cool confidence. She is about “the journey.” She has a lot of domestic hobbies that she is turning into a career, cooing that she’s “never thought” about a cookbook as her friends laud her cooking.

Some of her tips are pretty low effort, like when she opens a bag of peanut butter pretzels and moves a handful into another bag and labels it (yes her penmanship is truly remarkable). But overall, she does seem to want to learn and work and thrives in aesthetic calmness. 

Watching this, the effort is there and she seems to want to do well and is eager to impress. We can click on a thousand YouTube tutorials on how to make a candle, the value proposition here is that Meghan Sussex is showing us how to make candles. It’s not about teaching, but presenting. Candles, sure. But would you learn how to make plantain chips from Meghan? Or play American mahjong? (Lainey do not yell at me, that’s what she calls it!) Or trust her advice when she has to be gently reminded how to shred chicken? I don’t know. I also think there’s an aspect about the specific viewpoint of the show that I may have missed and it relates to her being a Californian – this Eater review got me thinking about it.

At its core, this show is Meghan Sussex. Watching it, I had no doubt that she was heavily involved in production and had a high level of control and this is the show she wants to present, which of course dovetails with her product line, As Ever. How many seasons she can sustain people’s interest using honey puns and terms like “manwich” is to be determined.

This show is a love letter to Meghan. This isn’t a love letter to the audience, it’s a celebration of her. But isn’t that what we, as women, are encouraged to do? Put our own oxygen mask on first, take care of ourselves before we can take care of others. That’s what this show is putting into practice. This is by Meghan, for Meghan. And I don’t think it’s an exercise in ego. On some level, it must feel good for her to point out that a grubby editor at a UK tabloid may spend hours obsessing over “Me-Gain” headlines, but she’s eating preserves with Mindy Kaling and they both smell good and have shiny hair, so f-ck you. She’s saying it in the most polite way possible, of course. What’s still a question for me is where the audience fits in this and if a real connection can be made.

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Here's Meghan seen at Ludlow House for a Netflix event this week.