Parent Pimps JailBait CakeFace Miley Cyrus has finally succeeded in looking older than Ali Lohan. Congratulations! Check out JailBait at the CMAs last night if you can find her under that volcano of makeup that’s exploded all over her face. The point of being young and youthful and no wrinkles and NOT EVEN By Lainey • Nov 13, 2008 03:01 am
Gorgessity Red Belle Lips Reese Witherspoon presented last night at the CMAs looking so happy and so healthy, in red lips and black lace and big hair and embracing the country spirit. Reese is just kicking off promotion now for Four Christmases with Vince Vaughn. Movie poster is attached. She really is that short. By Lainey • Nov 13, 2008 02:16 am
Girly Throw Downs Teen Triangle! F-ck the Brange and Aniston. Teen cheating is what it’s all about. So Taylor Swift was dating one of the Jonas Brothers. Joe, I think? Whatever. They broke up, she decided not to take the discreet route, told everybody he did it over the phone, in like, 27 seconds, By Lainey • Nov 13, 2008 02:06 am
Girly Throw Downs Backpedalling with the Mighty Opes I might actually PVR this sh-t. If only to see how far Oprah jumps up Jennifer Aniston’s ass. The show taped yesterday, will air today, and as you would expect, the two were as gushy feely as they’ve always been. According to audience members, Jennifer’s words for By Lainey • Nov 13, 2008 01:42 am
Michael Cera The Bluths are alive!!! Oh toying with our emotions! First they were all like, yeah yeah it’s coming back. They’ll be a movie. Then Michael Cera was like, no, I’m a movie star, I don’t want to be George Michael. But now… Just the other night… Jeffrey Tambor confirmed that By Lainey • Nov 12, 2008 09:55 am
Girly Throw Downs Edward > Zac High School who? Exactly. It made a lot of money but the hype has been replaced. By Twilight. Twilight mall tours have resulted in fandemonium-related injuries, fangirls are losing their sh-t, fanmoms are leaving their children for hours for a glimpse at Robert Pattinson… and I’ve heard exclusively that By Lainey • Nov 12, 2008 06:58 am
Girly Throw Downs When all else fails… There is still her body. And her body is sick. More from Jennifer Aniston in December Vogue. More for Victoria Beckham to stab furiously. These are much, much better than what Anna Wintour chose to slap on the front. Less ragged, less sun damaged, and again… that body. And her By Lainey • Nov 12, 2008 06:36 am
Maple Leaf Shania’s back! It’s country’s big night! The CMAs! And People is reporting that the big surprise of the evening will be the newly single Shania Twain! She’s been keeping low since her devastating split from husband Mutt Lange earlier this year but clearly, on the industry’s biggest night, By Lainey • Nov 12, 2008 04:28 am
Parent Pimps What Britney wants After a hospital scare the other day, Britney was in much better spirits yesterday with her family and her booboos at an alligator farm in Louisiana, enjoying some down time before hitting the road hard to promote Circus which drops on December 2nd, her birthday. But is that what she By Lainey • Nov 12, 2008 03:25 am
Baby and Bump Obsession Pregnancy perfect How’s this for un-taupe pregnancy style? Naomi Watts, who seems like she’s been pregnant forever, in New York yesterday looking like she’s pretty ready. Naomi’s alleged bestie Granny Kidman was in New York earlier this week and there are rumours that Gran didn’t bother to By Lainey • Nov 12, 2008 02:26 am
Jessica Simpson He got the trainer My husband and I joke about it all the time. But seriously. Who gets the dog if we divorce? I say me because Marcus was my 30th birthday present. He says him because I’m just Marcus’s food bitch. Needless to say, never mind anything else, over the dog… By Lainey • Nov 12, 2008 02:08 am
Intro for Nov 12, 2008 Dear Gossips, Friday Night Gay? Yay! Ausiello reported yesterday that someone came out on Friday Night Lights last night. Who was it? No! Don’t tell me! I have to know! Wait! I can’t! UGH! FNL is currently airing on DirecTV and will premiere on conventional television in January. By Lainey • Nov 12, 2008 01:48 am
Famewhores Consolation Shopping Poor Posh lost out to a ragged Jennifer Aniston for the December issue of Vogue. To date, Anna Wintour has yet to bless Mrs Beckham with her approval on the cover. To soothe her sorrows, Victoria decided to head to the mall for some fun times with her youngest son By Lainey • Nov 11, 2008 12:27 pm
Famewhores Posh can’t top this??? What does Victoria Beckham want more than anything in life? More than anything, Victoria Beckham wants, needs, dreams of, salivates over, is begging for a US Vogue cover. And that amazing bitch Anna Wintour won’t give her one. So can you imagine what Posh must be thinking? Today of By Lainey • Nov 11, 2008 09:54 am
Douchebags Pippy’s so man! Pip’s balls may not have dropped all the way, but he swaggers like he’s a real man, all badass and ready to rumble with his security close behind him prepped to jump in as he confronts a pap for shooting him while he’s eating. Video is below. By Lainey • Nov 11, 2008 08:05 am
Gossip Girl Humphrey Hate-on They say Brooklyn is cool. If Brooklyn is so cool, why do the Humphreys live there? Because the Humphreys all suck ass. All of them. Ugh. Last night’s Gossip Girl wasn’t the best. Probably because there wasn’t enough Chuck. Mostly because there was too much Dan. And By Lainey • Nov 11, 2008 05:02 am
