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The Lohan/Hilton War & the Battle of Brandon Davis
Brandon Davis

The Lohan/Hilton War & the Battle of Brandon Davis

The bloadsoaked streets of Paris are making me thirsty for conflict. And seriously, is there anything better than a good old fashioned Hollywood catfight, with good vs. evil and a clear, cocaine drawn line between the two? I think not. Every war is characterised by key battles. The Lohan/Hilton
By Lainey • May 18, 2006 08:00 am
Halle Berry is budget all over
Halle Berry

Halle Berry is budget all over

That weave must go. SOOO ghetto, don’t you think??? As for the budget dress - I don’t care who designed it. Anything that looks this tacky and this cheap, that gives Halle THE BODY a bulge is wrong, wrong, wrong. Pregnancy rumours? Sure, fire ‘em up again. Especially
By Lainey • May 16, 2006 08:00 am
The Daily Malnourished: Ellen Pompeo
Nicole Richie

The Daily Malnourished: Ellen Pompeo

So I was slow getting on the Grey’s bandwagon. VERY SLOW. Never watched an episode until last week, when I rented the first season dvd and got completely junkied. LOVE Isaiah Washington. LOVE my home girl Sandra Oh! The show is pure genius and Ellen Pompeo is an appealing
By Lainey • May 16, 2006 08:00 am

Strong and not

She might speak her own mind, but I hear she doesn’t act her own mind. Tough as nails is what we thought all along. All of us. Which is why this is surprising the small but growing network of people who have been privy to the inside scoop – the
By Lainey • May 16, 2006 08:00 am
Paris Hilton

Intro for May 16, 2006

Dear gossips, Two words about London? Smutty sophistication. Y’all are some hardcore gossips and I love you for it. Here are some of the delightful things I’ve picked up from my delightful new English sources. Try to keep up: 1. Apparently, Golden Balls waxes everything. EVERYTHING. Indeed, if
By Lainey • May 16, 2006 08:00 am
The Daily Malnourished: Kate Bosworth
Kate Bosworth

The Daily Malnourished: Kate Bosworth

Poor Kate must have been having a fat day. Because starvation can sometimes lead to weird gas and weird gas can lead to bloating and bloating can drive young actresses to depression – the worst combination for a public outing. Love the sucking lips expression, common among those who’ve sworn
By Lainey • May 14, 2006 08:00 am
Adorable Baby Violet
Brad Pitt

Adorable Baby Violet

Same little face. Same little dimples. Same full mouth. Wee Violet is just like mom, non? And while I’m never particularly excited by the mostest dullest Jennifer Garner, I have to tell you…her child is cuteness overload. I suppose it’s a surprising reproductive advantage to being taupe
By Lainey • May 14, 2006 08:00 am
The Daily Perverted: Jessica & Joe
Ashlee Simpson

The Daily Perverted: Jessica & Joe

Is it just me or did you throw up a little in your mouth? Here’s a former Baptist minister who knows his daughter’s cup size and has no qualms about wheeling and dealing her career towards a music video that shows her writhing around practically nekked on top
By Lainey • May 14, 2006 08:00 am
Lindsay pale and pasty

Lindsay pale and pasty

At a charity benefit the other night. So I think I’m going to start calling her o-fer. As in 0 for 25. As in a batting average of 0.00 – perhaps even less. Can you remember the last time she didn’t look dirty and/or washed out? You
By Lainey • May 14, 2006 08:00 am
Dean McDermott defines Goldiggery
Kevin Federline

Dean McDermott defines Goldiggery

Nothing to do on a 9 hour flight but stock up on celebrity rags and kill time. Made the mistake of reading the People Magazine article with exclusive details on Dean McDermott’s goldmine of a wedding in Fiji. Total trainwreck, y’all. You read and you cringe and you
By Lainey • May 14, 2006 08:00 am
The Daily Frozen: Meg Ryan
Nicole Kidman

The Daily Frozen: Meg Ryan

At some magazine awards the other night. Maybe not as much as Nicole Kidman but creepy creepy all the same. Why is it that some people get surgerised and look wickedly pulled and taut and then some people do it and look weirdly shiny and puffy - almost bloated but
By Lainey • May 11, 2006 08:00 am
Uma in London
Jason George

Uma in London

This broad is some kinda hotness. Even when she"s dressed like Camilla Parker Rottweiler, even when she"s greasy and bland, even when she"s not showing off those amazon legs, there is something so refreshing about the fact that she"s not wearing a
By Lainey • May 11, 2006 08:00 am
Lindsay Lohan: the Mossification continues
Kate Moss

Lindsay Lohan: the Mossification continues

The leggings, the blow, the partying, the overt copycat style…and now a romance with a hermaphroditic freak who also happened to date Kate. It"s tragic, non? How hard my girl is trying to be Moss? An endearing reminder that even though she looks like she"s
By Lainey • May 11, 2006 08:00 am
The Daily Ugly: Halle Berry
Halle Berry

The Daily Ugly: Halle Berry

Obviously Halle Berry isn"t ugly. But her dress is. And her hair too. The peekaboo lace, the budget looking embroidery, the straight outta the 90s necklace - It"s the kind of ensemble best worn with cheese ass acrylic nails and too much hairspray, on a gumsmacking
By Lainey • May 11, 2006 08:00 am
Courteney & Jen: a beauty-off
Cameron Diaz

Courteney & Jen: a beauty-off

Umm…Courteney Cox, hands down. Never understood why it was always Aniston getting the hype on Friends and not Courteney. Maybe it was those permaperky nipples that just wouldn"t go to bed. But side by side? No comparison, y"all. None. Take a look at Jen and
By Lainey • May 11, 2006 08:00 am
Britney Spears: non news & wishful thinking
Britney Spears

Britney Spears: non news & wishful thinking

Like you were surprised??? On the off chance you"ve been confined to gossip detox for the last 24 hours, Britney Spears went on Letterman last night and confirmed the worst kept secret in Hollywood - that Kevin Federline is the most fertile man in the history of sperm
By Lainey • May 11, 2006 08:00 am
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