Rachel Bilson made a revelation about climaxing during sex on her podcast, Broad Ideas, on Monday.
Speaking to Whitney Cummings, Rachel shared that her first orgasm during intercourse didn’t happen until she was 38.
The conversation started when Whitney revealed she only had her first orgasm during sex within the last year after deciding to come off birth control, adding that there didn’t need to be a penis involved in order for it to happen.
“I could do it with my hands whenever,” Whitney said. She then went on to describe how her partner’s straight penis worked well for her uterus, which she says is tilted, and the combination led her to experiencing her first orgasm from intercourse.
Rachel and Whitney are just some of the celebrities shining a light on women’s dissatisfaction when it comes to sex. Last year, I wrote about a conversation between Julia Fox and Emily Ratajkowski that highlighted Julia Fox’s asexuality, with one of the reasons for her lack of interest in sex being the likelihood of dissatisfaction.
Another common thread between Whitney and Rachel’s conversation and Julia and EmRata’s is the discussion of motherhood, and how parenting can change our relationship with sex.
“A lot of women say they don’t orgasm from sex until after they have a kid,” Whitney said, a statement Rachel seemingly agreed with.
While these women may be chalking it up to a wide range of factors - from parenting to having a tilted uterus - science backs their claims of orgasms from penetration being unlikely for women. This study shows only 18.4% of women surveyed reported penetration alone was sufficient for an orgasm. However, 36.6% of women reported clitorial stimulation as a necessary component for an orgasm during intercourse.
The same sentiments are echoed by Dr. Lauren Streicher, MD and author of Sex Rx: Hormones, Health, and Your Best Sex Ever.
"The bottom line is that the majority of women do not have an orgasm from penetration and need clitoral stimulation," she said.
A 2022 study revealed women fake orgasms to make men feel less ‘fragile’. This is especially the case when women view their male partner’s manhood as precarious – also resulting in lower sexual satisfaction, less orgasms and less honest communication.
Interestingly, the study showed that women who earned more money than their partners were twice as likely to fake orgasms. This is something EmRata touched on during a podcast episode featuring queer model and TikTok star Olivia Ponton, which I wrote about here. The pair explored the idea of men feeling emasculated by women who earned more and demonstrated confidence.
Women like EmRata and Rachel often discuss their sex lives on their podcasts, with Rachel in particular attributing her openness to the “sex-positive” and “free” home she grew up in. But for women who didn’t grow up in such environments, it’s hard to know what other women are experiencing in the bedroom. Not everyone is willing to hop on a podcast and share their most intimate experiences.
Part of the reason these conversations are so important is because they provide visibility and validation for the many women who are not satisfied with their sex lives and resort to remaining silent or faking it in order to appease their male partners.
But the main reason these conversations are so important is because we need more women voices exposing the archaic ideas surrounding sex – like the idea that it is about a man’s satisfaction only. Through having these open and honest conversations, they’re encouraging women to advocate for themselves and their pleasure in the bedroom, whether through getting their partners to get to know their bodies or incorporating resources that increase the chances of her satisfaction, which in the end, can help to make sex as a whole become a more equal experience.