Reality Recap: An investigator, an instigator, and a King

Did you know that friendship breakup statements are a thing? Two women from Real Housewives of Dubai fueled a lot of chatter online when a statement was made about their ‘amicable’ parting. I didn’t know who Matt Rogers was until this week but I will never forget him after this very thoughtful and thorough read of Teresa Giudice. And if you haven’t heard Garcelle talking to Jeff Lewis about the worst and most expensive advice she ever got from Bethenny Frankel, please listen to this!

Sara’s handsome guy turns out to be thirsty, insecure and controlling

When Sara Al-Madani first introduced us to her love interest, Akin Fontana, in the fifth episode of this season of Real Housewives of Dubai, we all think the same thing, he’s handsome, and he’s great with her son. And he is both of those things, but unfortunately, that seems to be where it ends.

This week, Sara and Saba sit down and have a conversation. And Saba takes Sara to task over news that Akin is forbidding Sara to partake in a podcast with an undisclosed host that he takes issue with. Sara is bothered by this because she stands to earn a whopping $45,000 just from doing the interview. In her mind, it’s just business. But to Akin, it’s more personal.

Saba rightfully reminds her that unless he is paying the bills, she’s got to earn an income for herself, and if a podcast is a guaranteed way to rake in a decent amount of cash in a short span of time, who is he to say no?

The relationship doesn’t seem to be over just yet in the show, but last week Sara revealed to Page Six that she hired a private investigator to look into him and slams him for being ‘thirsty’ and wanting to feed off of her fame.

It was interesting to watch this scene because as the Western audience watches with a lot of pre-conceived misconceptions about Muslim women, and episode after episode they remind us that a lot of us have got it all wrong. 

But it was also interesting because even in Dubai, the women are saddled with a lot of the same dating drama that North American housewives are. We’ve seen a ton of thirsty men sweet talk their way into filming, and become even messier than the women (Peter Thomast, Simon Guobadia, Brooks Ayers). Many of them concocted elaborate lies to earn a spot or remain on the show, with the latter of those three men being dishonest about cancer of all things. And the most commonly used guise is pretending to not want to film or be affiliated with the show. 

Take good old John Janssen, for example. He is reportedly pissed with Shannon for making his life so public, and what does he do after their split? Go and date another reality star, of course. Sara has reminded us all of two things – the first is to never let a man interfere with how you make your money, and the second? Never be afraid to hire a private investigator.

Group division continues on Real Housewives of Orange County

Speaking of John Janssen, we need to talk about his insufferable girlfriend, Alexis, who took full advantage of the two separate group trips this week by having that very cringey, very public phone call with John, where she said that if he were there, she’d only be wearing her Louboutins. 

First of all, the rest of the women are waiting for so you can all leave together. Why are you making them wait even longer so you can call your haggard boyfriend? Second, why would he be there? It’s a girl’s trip FFS. 

I think both Alexis and producers love these kinds of scenes where her and John get to interact. But is no one realizing the second-hand embarrassment the audience feels for her? The desperation is truly palpable. 

The thing is, scenes that feature some element of John in the way we saw him last night are harder to come by when the whole group is together. Which, for the two separate trips to Big Bear and La Quinta, they were not. And how could they be? Shannon and Tamra can’t be in a room together after last week’s explosive dinner, and Heather and Katie have…a lot to discuss.

We’ve been seeing a lot of this group division on the other shows, lately. It plagued the entire last season of Real Housewives of New Jersey, and as we saw, it completely changed the format and the dynamic of the “reunion”. We’ve also seen it over on Real Housewives of Dubai, though on a much smaller scale, with Ayan refusing to go out with the women in Bali and more recently, with Taleen and the two Carolines refusing to go out in their traditional Balinese dresses and opting to stay back at the villa instead. 

So I completely understand the production value that these kinds of trips and dynamics can create. Some women go the extra mile when others in the group are not around – they gossip more, or they switch it up completely and find it easier to make amends. So yes, a lot of watch-worthy moments can come from these dynamics and the episodes dedicated to the division in the group. But, these women need to remember that this is work. It’s a job. In the same way some people have to work in an office beside people they don’t enjoy, you’ve got to film with them just the same.

Carlos King lives up to his name

I was listening to my new favourite podcast, Queen of the Con, recently, when the host did an entire season on Jen Shah. Near the end of the season, he brought in none other than Carlos King to share his perspective.

Hearing Carlos divulge his wealth of knowledge about everything Housewives made me do a bit of a deeper dive on him and it’s very clear that the man deserves lots and lots of flowers. 

Here’s the thing – most of the reality bloggers and fan accounts are run by either white women or gay white men. There are a lot of Black voices missing in conversations about Housewives – and when their voice are featured or included somewhere, it’s typically only about the Black housewife franchises, Real Housewives of Atlanta and Real Housewives of Potomac.

So this week, when Carlos shared his thoughts on Jenn Fessler, not only was I intrigued by what he was saying, I was in complete agreement. On his podcast, Reality with the King, he reflected on her role in the show, saying she doesn’t have what it takes to be on reality TV, particularly Real Housewives of New Jersey. And he is correct.

He cites the fact that, despite assigning herself the role of moderator during that explosive pre-season finale, she abruptly left when things got heated, saying she couldn’t handle it. He also says she should’ve had the courage to go into the other room and least say hello to the women. But she didn’t. And she was easily swayed by Margaret throughout the season. What makes his takes especially refreshing is that he does the exact opposite of what he’s criticizing. He’s not in anyone’s pocket, he’s an independent thinker, and he’s not afraid of coming face-to-face with housewives he’s shaded. More of that, please!