The Most Exhausting Supporting Actor Competition

The show’s overall pace was good, especially toward the beginning. And Robert Downey, Jr.’s introduction of the five nominees in the Best Supporting Actor category was incredibly skillful, in a move that nobody else was able to replicate quite as well. True, it necessitated RDJ acting like he was everyone’s father and their emotionally withholding drama professor, but he spoke directly to each nominee in a way that felt real. A bit much, it’s safe to say, particularly the “don’t try to be as charming as me, Kieran Culkin” bit, but aside from feeling like he always needs a little more spotlight than he’s due, no harm no foul. 

He continues, skillfully but gently ribbing Jeremy Strong for being a Serious Actor, and everyone chuckles because everyone knows, because this is a roomful of people who, like me, will never forget that the man said the end of Succession “made sense dramaturgically”. 

There’s no coming back from that, you’ve labeled yourself an Actor. And anyone who dared to watch The Apprentice knows Jeremy Strong leans all the way in to playing very, very scary men with a relish that is alarming. Serious Actor is the gentlest label we could possibly bestow. 

And yet… the man gives us moments like these, so he’s not without whimsy, right? 

The half an avocado I cut open and tried to save for later

— Zack Bornstein (@zackbornstein.bsky.social) 2025-03-03T01:55:35.030Z

Anyway, so Culkin wins, as every single person knew he would, and he does his practiced “I’m not prepared” routine. By ‘practiced’ I mean that in each acceptance he does two things – profoundly thanks his manager, in a way that’s sincere and indicative of a really deep relationship, and then moves on to ‘hilariously’ telling the world he’s trying to get his (sorry, but it must be said: absolutely stunning) wife for more children, and she acts shocked, and everyone roars with laughter…

And I have two thoughts at the same time: 

First – do we really think this ‘my win should net me children, right?’ bit was enough to be sustained over a year-plus of acceptance speeches? True, he didn’t know he’d be in this position all year, but it’s disingenuous to imply that you just happen to come up with this concept as you appear onstage with an award in your hand – you’re the one bringing it up, dude! I’ll stop short of referring to it as ‘breedy’, and true, his wife seems to be into the whole deal, but like…don’t pretend it’s not a schtick. 

Second – wouldn’t it be fun or possibly terrifying to think about Strong’s internal monologue as Culkin, who beat him out for the Emmy in the last season of Succession, wins yet again?

Because if I’m Strong, I’m watching the ‘I’m a profanity-laden goof who loves his wife!’ routine, remembering that this is a guy who played my inept baby brother whom everyone loved to protect on Succession, looking back at the awards season sweep that has been fueled by speeches exactly like this one, and thinking “That little ‘natural’, ‘unstudied’ actor is pulling the same exact routine for the better part of a decade!” 

Like – am I alone here? Is this just an older sibling rant?  If you’re supposed to be a serious actor, and the guy who keeps beating you out for acting awards keeps on with the “I dunno, it just happened, hey my wife is hot, we might make babies later!” routine, you’d have to start thinking “I can’t believe they’re still buying this crap! Still!” It’s like if you’re a math genius and the guy who keeps beating you on math tests is all ‘I just guessed!’ 

I choose to believe that combination of “are you kidding me” mixed with “everyone’s really buying this, huh?” is what accounts for the expression of vaguely amused shock on Strong’s face at the very, very end of Culkin’s speech (3:12 in this clip). 

Who knew someone could out-exhaust the guy who thought he had being exhausting all sewn up, especially when a third  exhausting guy said as much just moments ago? The world is a puzzlebox of Supporting Actor schtick!  At least we know next time Jeremy Strong gets on an awards carousel again, he will not disappoint sartorially… I can only imagine what he’s now going to have time to come up with.

As a sidebar, you know who’s blissfully not exhausting? Strong’s costar, Sebastian Stan, who was the unproblematic, uncomplicated antidote to all of this, having played the world’s most reviled man and not talked about the toxic pain of any of it, instead bringing his mom along because the world needs more of this kind of uncomplicated joy: