Maybe to a certain section of sports fan Tom Brady is a god, but in pop culture circles he continues to be the most divorced man who ever divorced. JLo has been divorced four times and she is far less divorced than Tom Brady.

What is it about Tom? He is elite in his accomplishments, he is well groomed, he is gainfully employed, he doesn’t have a bad reputation. He’s not stumbling out of nightclubs or doing TikTok dances, he’s not dating 22-year-olds or fighting with people in the comment section. There’s nothing offensive about him. Sure he’s never eaten a strawberry but that’s not a crime, necessarily.

But he exists in this weird space alongside corny billionaires and ex-husbands of Real Housewives. It’s full of aggressive dental work and rhythmically challenged dance moves and pants that are a little “Miami 2016.”

He shouldn’t live there, if you think about it. He has seven Super Bowl rings. He was married to a generational super model. But there’s an aura gap – he doesn’t have David Beckham’s branding, or Michael Jordan’s deity status, or Tiger Woods’s nostalgia. He’s like a B2B guy who is always posting on LinkedIn. He’s just there.

And you get the feeling he’s a little restless. He walked the runway for Demna’s first show at Gucci, which in theory should be a big deal. Demna’s Gucci is sleazy and vulgar (complimentary) and Tom Brady is not. Maybe this is supposed to be ironic, the good American boy meets the tacky Italian luxury house but it’s like when Katy Perry wore a head of cheese to the Met Gala – there’s just nothing behind the eyes, you know?

When he talks about how comfortable leather pants are (leather pants are not supposed to be comfortable! Somewhere in East Hampton, Tom Ford just threw a glass against the wall) the easy joke is that he is Ross from Friends. Even for those of us who didn’t watch the show, we know the joke: the divorced guy trying to impress his date with an impractical pair of leather pants.

Responding to a soft-ball question about Demna’s ethos of making this collection more accessible, Tom said, “I think there’s always a range for everybody in their day-to-day lives. Even for me, you know, I just want things that are really simple, really comfortable, but also very stylish.” About GUCCI? This isn’t Under Armour. I don’t blame Tom for taking this campaign because it sounds like Gucci came knocking but like what are we talking about here. Accessible leather pants? It’s a silly reach - let rich weirdos wear their weird little clothes, this is Gucci, not Ralph Lauren.

On a positive note, I think Tom is a really interesting antidote to incel red pillars, who assert that women are succubuses who only care about money, clout, jawlines and prestige. If that were true, Tom Brady would be the most sought-after bachelor in the world.

Click here for more of Tom Brady in GQ.

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Photo credits: Kyle Stevens/Shutterstock

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