Harry Styles resumed his Love On Tour last night in Los Angeles after several weeks off for the holidays, and it was a star-packed crowd that included Ellen DeGeneres, who was celebrating her birthday, Portia De Rossi, and also Jennifer Aniston. It was Ellen who once asked Harry, in 2020, about his “first celebrity crush” and he answered, “Probably Jennifer Aniston, I think”. 

 

Here’s Jennifer enjoying the “Watermelon Sugar”. 

But there’s another reason why Jennifer Aniston and Harry are trending on social media right now. With his first celebrity crush in the audience, Harry rocked it so hard that he split his pants:

 

I’m sure that was unpleasant for him. It’s a performance inconvenience to begin with, and then knowing that thousands of people saw it happen, which means thousands more will see it on social media… 

And then the Jennifer Aniston thing on top of that, poor guy. At least his dick didn’t pop out though, right? I’m dirty AF so that’s where my mind went. I saw Harry splitting his pants and I went straight to Lenny Kravitz’s dick popping out a few years ago when he was on tour. It was in Sweden, Lenny brought it down slow. And his pants decided to see if his penis could touch the ground. 

Lenny laughingly told Mr Porter a couple of years later that:

“I didn’t rip them. They became ripped. It was fine. But it was a little cold in Sweden. I would’ve warmed it up a little, had I known.”

 

Harry’s pants were much kinder to him, tearing along the side so that nothing, really, was exposed. But now are we Gossip Genie-ing him with Jennifer Aniston? I personally right now would rather see him with Shakira just because there’s so much drama with her ex and it would be the ultimate f-ck you to Gerard if that happened, but the prospect of Harry and Jennifer would be an interesting gossip experiment. 

There was a toxic segment of Harry’s fanbase that went full venom on Olivia Wilde the minute they were revealed to be dating. The attacks on Olivia were relentless and alarming; the list of reasons they opposed her is long and varied, and though they’d never admit it, one of those reasons is because she’s older. Jennifer Aniston is America’s Sweetheart with global popularity. Few people are as beloved as Jennifer. What would happen if Harry ended up with Jennifer? 

Attached: Harry in a friend's car in Santa Monica on Wednesday and in London with a friend on January 21, 2023.