Lawless opens next week. I saw it in Cannes. This is when I started summer crushing on Tom Hardy mostly for his relationship with Jessica Chastain in the film. For everyone else Lawless is an old fashioned dick fight, all honour and testosterone. Somehow I came out of there having watched a modern love story set in prohibition times. She navigates that entire relationship and the way he responds to it is so f-cking sexy even though his costume is basically a grandmother’s cardigan.
Jessica was not at the LA premiere last night. She’s in New York working on The Disappearance Of Eleanor Rigby and Tom wasn’t around because he’s in Africa for Mad Max. Here are Shia LaBeouf and Guy Pearce representing on the red carpet. Guy’s the villain in the movie. Maybe a little too over the top with the campiness but very effective nonetheless. As you can see, Shia had his girlfriend Carolyn Pho with him. A significant detail because a few days ago they were photographed tearfully arguing in public. Click here to see the pictures. Haven’t we all been there? And the relief afterward, remember?
Anyway, it was while shooting Lawless that Shia and Tom got into a fight which, I know, I know, is an old story but it’s a really good one and besides, I feel like no one remembers it and you should because it is FUNNY.
It all came out of Shia’s now notorious Details interview last year and if you’ve not read it, you should (click here) because he has no filter, none, and the sh-t that comes out of his mouth, well, no other star of his stature is quite as...revelatory. During that interview, Shia revealed that he and Hardy went at each other on set one day and suggested in conclusion that as a result of the ass-kicking he threw down, “(Hardy) never did that roughhouse stuff with me again".
Right?
But it gets better.
So then as a follow-up, after Shia puts out the story, Hardy is then asked about it when he’s promoting Warrior. Just... let me break it down so we’re clear: Tom Hardy, while promoting WARRIOR, is asked about the time Shia LaBeouf allegedly whooped his ass. Here’s how that went down according to Den Of Geek:
"I got knocked out by Shia LaBeouf, actually," Hardy said. "In Wettest County, apparently."
At this point, that the atmosphere in the room seemed rather unusual, as though no one involved quite knew whether Hardy was being serious or not. His use of the word ‘apparently' would also suggest that he was winding us up. Nevertheless, Hardy persisted with his version of what happened.
"[It was] behind the scenes," he said, before being almost drowned out by incredulous laughter, both from me and my fellow hacks, and the row of publicists sitting a short distance behind us. "No, he did," Hardy continued. "He knocked me out sparko. Out cold. He's a bad, bad boy. He is. He's quite intimidating as well. He's a scary dude."
When someone understandably asked Hardy how the fight started, Hardy was less clear.
"He just attacked me," Hardy said, provoking more laughter. "He was drinking moonshine. I was wearing a cardigan, and er, went down. I woke up in Pnut's arms."
To clarify, Pnut (pronounced Peanut) is Hardy's personal trainer. The actor continued, "He was concerned for me. I was like, ‘What was that? It was lightning fast.'" And he said, ‘That was Shia.' I said, ‘F-ckin' hell. Can we go home now?' ‘No, we've still got three weeks to finish.'"
Come on. This is the best, isn’t it?
And there’s more. Shia also recounted this story in Details when discussing how he’s having a hard time acclimating to how rich he is now:
Having grown up poor, LaBeouf says he feels "real shame" about the wealth he's acquired. He has no assistant, no driver. He bought his house, in a low-key part of town, for about $1 million. LaBeouf remembers his Wettest County costars (Jason) Clarke and (Tom) Hardy discussing sports cars. "They're talking about Ferraris and sh-t, like it's a cool car. If Clarke pulled up in a Ferrari right now, my idea wouldn't be, 'What a cool f-cking guy!' It would be, 'Look at this clown.' I think the fact that I despise that stuff keeps me safe," he adds with a smile. "I hang on to my dirt. I like my dirt."
If for no other reason, love him for this. Love him for what he gives us. Please never let him change.
And how are all these boys now, after all that beefing? Totally fine. They got on fine in Cannes. There is no animosity, no resentment, nothing. I guess that’s how you do it. Punch each other a few times and all the anger goes away.
