New New Star Wars has no right eyes

November 5, 2015 17:50:39 Posted at November 5, 2015 17:50:39
Sarah Posted by Sarah

Character posters for Star Wars: The Force Awakens were released yesterday, featuring Han Solo and Princess Leia, plus John Boyega’s Finn, Daisy Ridley’s Rey, and Adam Driver’s bad guy, Kylo Ren. For some reason, they all have their right eyes obscured. The Force hates righties? Also apparently the Force hates Luke Skywalker because he has once again been omitted from the marketing materials—it’s almost like they’re saving Luke for a big mid-movie reveal or something. Oscar Isaac’s Poe Dameron—the Star Warsiest of names—is also not present. This is not a spoiler because this is just me guessing, but I have a feeling he doesn’t make it all the way through the movie.

We’re about six weeks out from New New Star Wars’ inevitable worldwide domination, but since LucasFilm—and the JJ Abrams School of SECRETY SECRETS—isn’t willing to give up any more footage than shown in the one full-length trailer, Disney is forced to take a less traditional approach to marketing, which means it’s cross promotion time. Lainey texted me last night about Star Wars at the CMAs and in Cover Girl commercials and noted that it’s “off brand”. Eehhh, yes and no. The marketing for New New Star Wars has been low key up till now—for all the hype, there’s been very little actually doled out for consumption. But historically, Star Wars has been all about the licensing, so slapping “Star Wars” on random sh*t  is nothing new. As long as they stay away from sand-related items, I think we’ll be—oh no.

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