Back in November, Armie Hammer, while still campaigning for a Best Supporting Actor Oscar for his performance in Call Me By Your Name, did an interview with Vulture that went great. Then he was featured in The Hollywood Reporter and it was kind of a fumble. After that, Anne Helen Petersen analysed his career in a piece for Buzzfeed, Ten Long Years of Trying to Make Armie Hammer Happen. Armie had a suck attack about it, called AHP “bitter” on Twitter, and then packed up his toys and went home. He reactivated his Twitter at the end of January and has now reactivated his feelings about AHP. 

This is what AHP tweeted yesterday about the new Jennifer Lawrence profile in Vanity Fair. AHP is an academic, a legit PhD in gossip. She backs up her position by highlighting sentences and paragraphs that illustrate the article’s banality. It’s a whole thread: 

This isn’t about Jennifer Lawrence. It’s about how Jennifer Lawrence is presented. It’s a media analysis, a study of celebrity, and an observation of how outlets like Vanity Fair service the celebrity ecosystem. 

I’m not sure Armie Hammer picked up on that though: 

So AHP presents a reasoned, annotated argument…and Armie Hammer responds by telling her she should relax, because she’s too stressed out. Female Hysteria! The downfall of elegant society!  

Isn’t that pretty much what happened here? 

What also happened is that we now know that Armie Hammer is still in his feelings about AHP. Armie Hammer is basically hate-reading AHP. Armie Hammer has been sitting around, waiting for his “ah ha!” moment on AHP. Now we know that Armie has spent his precious celebrity time thinking about when he can clap back at AHP. Good look, non? Sexist AND petty. All in one day. Well done, Armie Hammer. 

Here's Armie at LAX the other day.