Lainey opened the site today by talking about the Big Dick Energy that is taking over social media and prompting all of us to wonder who in our friend group has BDE. (I’m going to posit that among the LG crew, Duana has the most BDE.) What I want to know, though, is what is the opposite of Big Dick Energy? I don’t think it’s Little Dick Energy, because that is a specific kind of energy that isn’t necessarily less forceful than BDE. LDE can be…vengeful, I think. I’m talking like, no dick energy. Like Ken Doll energy. Where there is just nothing happening. Like you think there SHOULD be something happening, because all the signs are there, but then nope, nothing happens. What is the inert state of Big Dick Energy? 

I need this term to describe how I feel about the first look at Brad Pitt and Leonardo DiCaprio in Quentin Tarantino’s Once Upon a Time in Hollywood. It’s the 1960s. DiCaprio is rocking a mustard turtleneck and a leather blazer. Pitt is doing Budget Redford. Objectively, these are two handsome men, beloved for decades by generations of women. They have both been Lust Objects during their careers (lust objects: people too old to have been thirst traps). But I look at this photo and I just feel nothing. It’s the Ken Doll thing. The signs are all there, but there is no dick energy.

Some of this apathy is, undoubtedly, down to the fact that DiCaprio and Pitt have never been my flavor. I get it if they’re yours, I’m not fighting over it, they’ve just never been mine. And some of it is, for sure, how annoyed I am at Quentin Tarantino right now, in general, and how annoyed I am at this project, specifically. I have to keep reminding myself Tarantino excels at making bad pitches into good movies, but right now I’m sort of out of patience with him and not willing to do that emotional labor. And so I’m left with this photo and the zero feelings it elicits. There is no dick energy in this photo, and I’m not going to expend my dick energy on it, either. 

(Lainey PS. In addition to Duana, Sarah also reps a LOT of BDE here at LaineyGossip.)