We haven’t slept since Sunday. There are currently over 12,000 words posted on the site today. And there are two words that sum up what I feel about Gwyneth Paltrow’s look last night: f-ck off.

Can we go now?

Wait no. I have more.

G was wearing Calvin Klein. And, like Gisele Bundchen, she didn’t give a sh-t about the theme, just like she didn’t give a sh-t about the theme in 2013 when it was Punk and she came in a pink dress from specifically the era that punk was protesting. G’s excuse was that she’d outgrown her punkness. And her excuse at this year’s MET Gala was that she wanted to pay homage to the first time she went to the MET Gala:


My first ever Met Ball in 1995. #calvinklein #fullcirclemomentcomingup

A post shared by Gwyneth Paltrow (@gwynethpaltrow) on


But… I have a theory. Are you sensing in a theme though in Gwyneth’s consistent rejection of themes that subvert the mainstream, that question the establishment, that challenge the dominant culture, that threaten the status quo?

There it is.

That, to me, is why Gwyneth Paltrow doesn’t participate. She doesn’t participate because she IS the status quo. She’s the f-cking privilege. She’s represents the boring standard. She’s exactly what punk and Comme Des Garcons seek to overthrow. So she’ll hold on to her safe pink sequins for as long as she can. But you can only hold off Rihanna for so long.