Are you watching The Shards?

I guess today’s inadvertent theme is “outside”, because Kaia Gerber is also outside, though on the west coast. Here she is sporting athleisure in LA (photos attached below as well as photos of Kaia with Lewis Pullman in LA yesterday). Why did I have to live in LA during the era of Millennial Outfits? Why couldn’t I be there for the athleisure revolution? So unfair.

Kaia is, of course, starring in The Shards, which is airing now on FX/Hulu. I haven’t started it yet. I am not in the right headspace for a round of “How Long Can I Watch Ryan Murphy’s New Show”. I DO wonder, though, about Bret Easton Ellis. Specifically, I wonder how he feels about The Shards being adapted before Donna Tartt’s The Secret History.

I also had these thoughts when that adaptation of Ellis’s novel Rules of Attraction came out starring James Van Der Beek. Ellis and Tartt attended Bennington College together in the 1980s, and both wrote about their time in an exclusive clique on campus. Ellis has had many of his books adapted, Tartt—who is objectively the better writer, argue with a wall—is stuck with that one crappy adaptation of The Goldfinch. The Secret History, inspired by Tartt’s time in college, has languished in development hell for decades. Meanwhile, Ellis’s American Psycho made for one of the greatest film adaptations of all time (in no small part thanks to writer/director Mary Harron). I would almost put up with Ryan Murphy producing it, if that’s what it takes to get an adaptation of The Secret History made.

Back to Kaia, though, everyone is making a big deal of her boring Vogue cover with Homer Gere. Maria wondered when Ryan Murphy became prestige enough to justify a Vogue cover, but have we also considered that most of the nepo babies are just pale imitations of their parents? Kaia Gerber is…not a commanding screen presence. Neither was her mother, Cindy Crawford, whose film career was more or less killed stone dead by the absolutely dreadful film, Fair Game.

I do think Kaia is a better actress than Cindy, but at no point have I seen Kaia Gerber in anything and thought she was the only possible choice for that role. Homer Gere, the jury is still out. But maybe that Vogue cover is so depressingly stale because these kids don’t have much to offer besides their surnames. Maybe they should try putting Lewis Pullman on the cover of Vogue. There's a nepo baby with a little something in the tank.

Anyway, someone tell me about The Shards and if I should attempt it or save my next spin of the Ryan Murphy wheel for the Lizzie Borden Monster season coming to Netflix. Holy goddess does it look BAD.