Best Mismatch: Drew Barrymore So I know her face doesn’t match her neck, but only when you look up close…right? Besides that, doesn’t Drew look divine? Healthy and sweet and fresh and glowing and single and most of all, boobs NOT flailing from side to side – I admit it…I can’ By Lainey • Jan 16, 2007 07:00 am
Donald Trump Worst Couple: The Trumps A windbag and his femmebot and her monster sized tits…and he has the nerve to call Rosie ugly??? Bitch…please. Your wife is wearing POWDER BLUE!!!! By Lainey • Jan 16, 2007 07:00 am
Cutest Moment: Jack Nicholson Watching Jack was probably more entertaining than the entire show. Turning 70 this year and isn’t he still so f*cking cool? And also adorable when he wants to be? Jack’s daughter was Miss Golden Globe and his proud moment as she was announced was so genuinely endearing, By Lainey • Jan 16, 2007 07:00 am
Vanessa Minnillo Worst Rossum: Vanessa Minnillo Seriously y’all…I am done with Vanessa Minnillo. Done, over, sick, Rossum! Is it at all possible for this girl to wear anything other than orange? Or gold? Or teal? With sequins and pearls and rhinestones and a Miss America sash with gleaming white teeth? Question: What is wrong By Lainey • Jan 16, 2007 07:00 am
Most Predictably Prom: Katherine Heigl I love her but enough…enough with the debutante princess, enough with the fishtail, enough with the updo, and the aunt Gladys brooch, enough with the nauseating PROM. I mean the People’s Choice Awards was one thing… But the Golden Globes? I think we all know that Katherine Heigl By Lainey • Jan 16, 2007 07:00 am
Jennifer Aniston Best Friend of Jennifer Aniston: Sheryl Crow In eggplant Elie Saab and making Lance Armstrong look like a complete tool – don’t you love the way Sheryl bounces back? From heartbreak, from cancer, from the worst year of her life to the best she’s ever been…I was never a big fan of Sheryl Crow until By Lainey • Jan 16, 2007 07:00 am
Best Body: Emily Blunt I have no idea why she always looks so dour. Would you look dour with a body like that? Thin but fit, slim yet strong, every inch sealed in perfectly, and a perky ass to round things out… tonight Emily Blunt was spectacular. That is until she spoke. The charmless By Lainey • Jan 16, 2007 07:00 am
Nicole Kidman Best New Eater: Ellen Pompeo So there’s a little bit of Nicole Kidman Freeze goin’ on around the face…so what? The point is she looks like she’s been eating…maybe not much but definitely not nothing and doesn’t that stand for something? Ellen Pompeo, I believe this is Versace, and a By Lainey • Jan 16, 2007 07:00 am
Joaquin Phoenix The Golden Globes Wrap-Up First things first… Ummm…. Joaquin Phoenix? And that deep voice? Loin quiveration all over again. Makes me want to reconsider. Next… I refuse to write about Sharon Stone. Period. Finally… It’s not about looking “nice”. Nice is for you and me and WE are not THEM. They have access, By Lainey • Jan 16, 2007 07:00 am
Tom Cruise Beckham the Thespian? Source So says Georgio Armani who might not have a bitchbeating fan like Karl Lagerfeld but who clearly has an opinion about the most random subjects. Armani says that if Becks did indeed accept a $250 million deal then he absolutely did the right thing…especially with his good looks By Lainey • Jan 15, 2007 07:00 am
Keri Russell Naomi Watts: The Kidman Alternative At the Penfolds Australia event the other day in LA and NOT Down Under as reported earlier re: Isla Fisher - thanks to the kind reader who alerted me, am writing remotely so I don’t have your email handy. Big fan of Naomi though not of the dress – for By Lainey • Jan 15, 2007 07:00 am
Ryan Reynolds Single Reese: Red & Fringed At the LA Film Critics Awards last night. Not feeling the fringe but all over the red, and if this is just a taste of tonight at the Globes, single Reese will absolutely rock that carpet – perhaps the most eligible lady of the night? Well…only if she doesn’t By Lainey • Jan 15, 2007 07:00 am
Kate Bosworth Kate Bosworth: the opposite of pinned What’s the opposite of Lilo’s pinned pupils? It’s called dilated pupils, also a sign of using the good stuff, illustrated beautifully here by Kate Bosworth last week at a party for Gucci. The good news? Marginal improvement on the body front. The bad news? Those Dead Eyes By Lainey • Jan 15, 2007 07:00 am
Penelope Cruz Straight Pene gears up for the Globes As in her hair. Long straight locks – total gorgessity, non? Here’s Pen at the Critics’ Choice Awards on Friday looking healthy and beautiful and 100% ready for a longshot awards season run. At this point, NO ONE is taking down Helen Mirren but it really would be that much By Lainey • Jan 15, 2007 07:00 am
Ryan Reynolds Critics’ Choice: Euphoria for McGosling That earsplitting sound you heard on Friday night was the collective squeal of a million McGoslings losing their sh-t over Ryan and Rachel’s together togetherness at the Critics’ Choice Awards in Santa Monica. Still a couple, definitely still adorable, even with the pink hair and the sexual predator moustache. By Lainey • Jan 15, 2007 07:00 am
Jennifer Garner Jennifer Garner: Taupe in Blue At the Critics’ Choice Awards on Friday – beautiful…but boring. And that’s the big knock when it comes to Taupe, non? Has she ever really OWNED a dress? As pretty as she is, with that dewy skin and those full lips and those warm brown eyes and the lovely, By Lainey • Jan 15, 2007 07:00 am
