Royalites have been shouting at me for the last 3 hours or so because of my previous post about Meghan Markle’s adjectives, or missing adjectives. I’m in rehearsal for The Social every day from 11:40am – 12:30pm ET and then the show goes live at 1pm ET for an hour so most of the content that goes up on the site between those hours is pre-written. I usually edit two posts (Maria’s Smutty Social Media and another piece either by Kathleen and/or Sarah) during our commercial breaks and then, three or four times a week, as soon as The Social goes to black, I run upstairs to the etalk studio to tape that night’s episode. Which means I can’t get to any new writing until at least 2:45pm ET. And it takes me at least half an hour to bang off a post. That’s where we are now. And, yes, that was me, busy-bragging. It’s one of my greatest skills. 

So. When I posted earlier about the Queen’s letter of consent about Prince Harry and Meghan’s marriage, comparing it to the language she used when Prince William and Kate Middleton were married, I was going off this article in The Telegraph from 2011. The Telegraph however was referring a fancier document that is issued after the regular printed-on-letterhead document that the Queen signed yesterday re: Harry and Meghan. And it was in that fancy ass document that the Queen referred to Kate as “Trusty” and “Well-Beloved”. Which means that when it’s time for Harry and Meghan to get their own fancy ass royal marriage approval scroll, Meghan could, and probably will, get her own adjectives. 

In other words, no royal shade. 

And a new conversation, which is: what will Meghan’s adjectives be? 

I guess it’s most likely that she too will be described as “Trusty” and “Well-beloved” so as not start any sh-t, the way I just tried to do. 

This reminds me of the Olympics. Are you an Olympics junkie? During the closing ceremony at Olympics, former IOC President Juan Antonio Samaranch started the tradition of declaring whatever Games had just hosted the Olympics the “best ever”. They’ve stopped doing this now though and when Jacques Rogge became IOC President, he started switching around the adjectives. Instead of “best ever”, it’d be, like, “the warmest”, or whatever. You get the idea. And then there’d be all kinds of analysis about the adjectives that were chosen and why and what would have been better. 

Wouldn’t it great if the Queen did the same thing? 

It’s fun with words! These people love their words!

I just got a hilarious email from a reader called Michael and his take on “trusty” and “well-beloved” is that this is how you would describe an old shoe. LOLOLOLOLOLOL. 

Anyway, give me some adjectives then, for Meghan. If there’s a possibility that the Queen might switch up her description in her fancy ass proclamation, what are the two words she’d use for Meghan instead of “trusty” and “well-beloved”? It can’t be too flowery because Her Majesty isn’t one for language fireworks. So we’re looking for a word that’s complimentary but not super sexy. Words like…

Constant, humble, stalwart, steadfast…