Johnny Depp is suing his former managers, alleging that they mishandled his finances. The managers are countersuing, insisting that they did their jobs, and the reason why Johnny’s broke is because he makes terrible decisions, spends outrageously, and wouldn’t listen when they told him to stop making it rain.

Now US Weekly is reporting that Johnny has been trying to build “his own private compound— complete with an underground tunnel system…. To make his dream a reality, (he) would connect his five neighboring cul-de-sac homes in the Hollywood Hills”.

Apparently he’s been collecting the houses and wants to construct a wall to separate his fiefdom from civilians and tourists who drive up in tour buses. Unfortunately there’s one more house he still needs (EVEN THOUGH HE ALREADY HAS FIVE) to complete the project and “the owner of the sixth house in the cul-de-sac is refusing to sell”, despite the fact that Johnny has thrown money at them.

Not a good look when you’re trying to accuse people of being irresponsible with your bank account. But, sure, let’s continue to believe Johnny Depp.  Also… how’s he going to build his bat cave down there when he’s supposedly so tight on cash he had to fire his longtime agent because he couldn’t pay her commissions? You can’t PAY someone who got you PAID for years and years but you want to turn your underground into the bowels of Hogwarts? 

Should we all make a pact to go see Pirates 5 so Johnny can have his f-cking tunnels?