Poor Bond 25. Every time to they try to get a little spotlight for themselves, they get Cats-trailered right off the internet. First it was doing a “live launch” of Bond 25 during Avengers-Winterfell Week,  and now it’s getting booted out of the trending topics by Marvel, AGAIN. We’ll get to that later, though. First, let’s discuss Bond’s big news, which is sadly not that Dev Patel is taking over as Bond, but that Bond 25 has a title. Yes, that’s right, a WHOLE ENTIRE TITLE! And that title is: No Time to Die.

Why are Bond titles always total word salad? They always seem like they were formulated out of a Scrabble bag. I love imagining these conversations. “What do you think of Live and Let Die?” It’s what we’re doing every day! “What about The Man with the Golden Gun?” It’s so literal I love it! “Thunderball?” Why not! “Moonraker?” Totally bonkers! “How about Quantum of Solace?” Sure, those are words! 

No Time to Die, is that like, “This is no time to die, James,” or is it more, “There is no time to die!” Or is it an oblique Dr. No reference? There has been speculation that Bond 25 is a riff on Dr. No. Is the title featuring the word “no” a clue, or is this just more meaningless Bond word salad? Either way, I hope this title gets worked into the dialogue somewhere, and I hope it comes out as, “No. Time to die.” It’s two complete thoughts. Like James Bond is all, “No,” and then he’s like, “Time to die.” That is the optimal delivery of this title-dialogue. 

And just in case you were wondering how that whole maybe-probably-cursed situation is working out, there are now TWO peeping tom incidents in the ladies’ loo. There really ISN’T any time to die, because everyone has to pull a shift on toilet patrol.