Prince Harry and Meghan Markle will be not at Priyanka Chopra and Nick Jonas’s wedding this week. This is not a surprise. And not just because Royal Meghan is pregnant. First of all, that wedding is being Vogued. Notice that Meghan didn’t come up in Priyanka’s Vogue feature? If Meghan is at the wedding, Vogue will want in on that. Which takes away from Priyanka and Nick, non? (Dlisted) 

Wait a minute… there’s a new reindeer? His name is Elliot. He looks really, really cute. I used to watch Rudolph every Christmas. I kinda miss it. For some reason, I can’t find it at Christmas anymore on TV. Probably because I’m too stupid to find it on the channel guide. Anyway, is Elliot trying to be the new Rudolph for another generation? (Pajiba)

Pretty sure there won’t be a Christmas miracle in the form of Nicki Minaj and Cardi B burying their feud. Nicki’s new video features Cardi’s enemies. And Cardi’s one of the entertainers of the years so…Cardi still probably comes out ahead, right? (TMZ) 
I’m all for print-clashing but this might be too much, even for me. It’s not so much the prints but the fit. If you’re going to print-clash so aggressively, everything can’t look like it’s been haphazardly thrown on top of each other. Right? (Go Fug Yourself) 
Megan Fox is doing press right now because she’s promoting a TV show about ancient mysteries. For some reason this reminds me of that Nicholas Cage movie series – what is a series? – where he’s like looking for pyramids? National Treasure? Anyway, it’s probably time to reboot that? They’re rebooting everything else. (Cele|bitchy) 

The Queen’s new portrait – she’s in a green velvet cape and… she looks amazing in it. (The Cut)