Everyone’s favorite mopey superheroes are back in the latest trailer for Avengers: Endgame. They’re showing off new hair, new suits, and getting their mope on as they prepare to take on Thanos in round two. I’m not super into the tone of these trailers, which only increase my feeling of “let’s just get through this” toward Endgame. I’m sure the movie itself will have more verve, and I understand the Avengers are dealing with their f-ck up resulting in the death of half the universe and it’s not going to be a picnic to fix it, but I watch these trailers and it’s like, Yeah, I get it, the Avengers are serious now. I just wish the marketing was pushing the hope button a little harder and the sad, grey button a little less. This is a tone they’re choosing to set, and it’s kind of a bummer. I’m still high from Captain Marvel, and this is how you step to Carol? Sad, and mopey, and bummed out? They could be playing the “hope rises with a second chance” card but instead they’re playing the “grief counseling and regrettable haircuts” card.
SPEAKING OF HAIRCUTS. What the EVERLOVING F-CK is happening on Black Widow’s head? Natasha has always had questionable hair—even as Scarlett Johansson herself had a sweet undercut going for a while—but this Endgame look is THE WORST. I had to pause the trailer and back up and make sure I wasn’t imagining the two-tone dye job. I WASN’T, THAT IS HER HAIR. Natasha’s like, I don’t even care anymore, I’m going to dye just the top part of my hair with Kool-Aid. We did that in summer camp. Natasha looks like she’s been to camp, with her bad dye job and braid.
Hawkeye, meanwhile, finally got a distinctive and cool look. The movies have completely wasted Hawkeye, one of the great comic relief Avengers, but at least here he looks cool. It’s pretty clear his family dusted, and he seems to be on some kind of rampage as a result. But mostly I’m just waiting to reboot Hawkeye on Disney’s upcoming streaming service, where the Matt Fraction comic book run can be done properly and we can get Superior Hawkeye Kate Bishop in here (and no, I do not think that is Kate in the trailer). Also, can we talk about the Avengers new suits? They’re horrible. They look like officemates dressed for a corporate team-building exercise at a weekend retreat in the woods. Of course, they probably wouldn’t look so bad if we hadn’t just seen Carol Danvers’ kick ass super-suit. There is no way they get Carol into one of these. I bet she incinerates hers on sight and sticks to her own look.
As we count down the last six weeks before Endgame comes out, I think the only question that really matters is: Do you think Cap has a jar of Bucky dirt on his desk?
