You remember that thirst trap Tom Brady posted a few weeks ago? Where he’s sitting in his underwear covering his junk, looking kinda like Jerry O’Connell? 

 

It wasn’t exactly the horniest photo. But maybe he’s been practising. Because a new shirtless Tom Brady photo was just posted by Tom Brady. He’s much more comfortable in this one, probably because he has his hands around the ball instead of covering his balls …

 

And this works well because I read a story about him at Page Six today that made me laugh. Apparently he’s “back in the dating game” and I guess someone out there wants us to know. 

“A source tells [Page Six] the quarterback “is dating around.”

“He’s shopping,” says the source of the newly eligible bachelor. “He is out and about.”

It’s the “shopping” that cracked me up. In my opinion, this could only have come from a dude, the kind of dude who in 2023 thinks it makes Tom Brady sound cool by describing his dating strategy as a consumer enterprise. Which in these times tells me he’s basically doing it on his phone. Scrolling and swiping – I guess that’s kinda like shopping? So maybe it’s unfair of me laugh at the word choice since for a lot of people, connecting with someone romantically often starts nowadays the same way you would buy a pair of pants or a tennis racket – with one finger and your phone in your hand. 

 

But what happens when Tom swipes right? What then? Like…how long before the rings come out? And I’m not talking about that kind of ring, but this kind of ring: 

Chrissy O throwback! Don’t tell me he’s precious with them when it showed up randomly on Ben Affleck’s nanny on a trip to Vegas! And that was back when Tom was still happily married. So now that he’s out here “shopping”, I would imagine he might be able to find some fresh uses for those rings. And if his “shopping” takes him to an influencer, I can’t wait to see what she would do with them.