Team MoMo and the Blackhole

The latest episode of All Stars 4 was certainly something. The challenge was a HUGE step up from previous weeks. Not only did the queens have to come up with a themed club night, decide on décor, music, entertainment, and a signature cocktail, they also had to build the sets themselves! To be honest, this last part was the funniest bit in the episode, but still that’s a lot! I don’t know about you, but if I were to compete on Drag Race, the only painting I should be expected to do is on my face. 

For me, the stars of this episode were Team MoMo and the Blackhole (Team MoMo and the Blackhole should be the name for my new indie band). Monet and Monique have a great working relationship, further evidenced by this episode, but they are also such amazing comedy queens. The scene where the two of them discuss how to apply paint to a wall could literally have been taken out of a gay Who’s on First sketch. Here’s the clip if you haven’t seen it; it cracks me up every time. 

I think we can all agree that ClubHive was the best club in terms of execution. The décor (Manila) was flawless, and their presentation was spot on, especially Trinity’s hosting of the Strip Spelling Bee. Let it BEE known that I would be amazing at that spelling bee, both because of my talent for spelling and my intense desire to remain clothed in public at all times. That being said, if you carefully listen to the judges’ critiques, most of them said that they didn’t want to leave the Blackhole. Even Michelle, who called it stupid fun, said she really enjoyed it. 

(Brief aside, but Susanne Bartsch came to WIN that night. Eyebrows? BEADED. Hair? MOHAWKED. Dress? SNATCHED. Honestly, she was the real MVP that night. Also, can you believe that she is 67 years old? 67 YEARS OLD!!! And she looks like that! Okay, the Meeting of the Susanne Bartsch Fan Club is now adjourned.)

If we’re just focusing on their club presentation, this is the strongest we’ve seen Team MoMo yet, and if it weren’t for their slip-ups on the outfits, they would have been the top two. Monique and Monet have an electric chemistry together and their looks in the club were fabulous. The ideas and the concept were just ridiculous enough to entertain, without pushing past the line of annoying. ClubHive was good, but I didn’t think it pushed any boundaries. What I mean is that although I was entertained, I could predict the queens’ jokes and gags. (By the way, if you didn’t see, Manila is a business tycoon and she is marketing ClubHive as a travelling theme. A. Genius idea B. Anyone want to go?)

Monique and Monet are suffering from the same difficulties they had in Season 10. While their personalities are fantastic (like Monet’s Maya Angelou and Monique’s narration), their looks are never quite polished in the way that Valentina, Trinity, or Manila are. So the question is: what do you think is more important, personality or look? This is a whole article in itself, particularly because it represents a larger, more fundamental question about the direction of the show. Drag Race used to involve more sewing and outfit challenges but has now shifted to acting and performance challenges, with an added emphasis on perfection on the runway. 

(Aside number two: Monet has been posting her looks on Instagram, and they look amazing. However, they look nothing like what she presents on the show. Does she just need more time? Or maybe more post production?)

I really want Monet and Monique improve their looks. We’ve seen flashes of their talent when they’ve won, but they’re inconsistent and that could cost them a spot in a competition this close. Plus, if they had won, we would’ve been spared that horrendous lip sync. I am a huge fan of “Right Round” (I could even lip sync it), and I was appalled at how poorly the two queens performed. Trinity pulled out a stunt in the worst way possible, one that was repulsive to look at, and was also derivative of Monet’s look in Season 10. Plus, if we can use women’s bodies to make fun of aging, why can’t we include a tasteful and elegant portrayal of periods? Yes, I am still mad about this. I didn’t like Latrice’s leotard and she wore the boots that she was clocked for in Season 4! Also, rolling on the floor is not a substitute for a good performance. The whole thing was just embarrassing, but I have a theory as to why. Welcome to my new segment, RuPaul’s Conspiracy Theories Race:

Though they made it seem like a dramatic moment, I think everyone had accepted that Valentina was going home. Naomi made it clear that she did most of the work, and Valentina even backed that fact up while everyone was painting. So when it came time to lip sync for your legacy, I’m wondering if both Latrice and Trinity were trying to throw the lip sync so they wouldn’t have to be the ones who eliminated Valentina. 

What’s the motivation? Remember when Nina Bonina Brown got a huge wave of fan hate, from simply lip syncing against her. I meant Valentina didn’t even know the words and they blamed Nina. Imagine if you actually made the decision to send her home? Terrifying. And that’s exactly what happened (more on that later). 

For now, I want more of Team MoMo, and more of Team MoMo ft. Naomi. After such an amazing performance last week, I don’t know why we’re sleeping on Naomi yet again, or why she is still not getting enough screen time. I guess there’s always next week but for now, long live Alien Baby.